feeling empty inside

so tired these days 

feeling empty inside 

not a glimpse of joy

my headaches have been getting stronger 

where to go and what to do

again i say i dont know

 

Advertisements

HAPPINESS

Happiness

i rarely feel it

but i love seeing it

even if i dont feel it myself

thats the reason i love kids

always so happy

i wish i can stay a kid forever

so happy all the time

never takes life seriously

maturity is my enemy

stay away i want to stay me

i want to have fun and laugh over the stupidest things

i dont want to grow up

 

is he different

wow

he’s so pretty

well he is in my eyes 

the way he talks is just amazing

if i ever saw him in real life 

id hug him and never let go 

yes hes that much

he makes my heart go like a tornado

i know what a wacko am i

he’s different 

i know it 

or should i think again

 

I wish

is this jealousy i feel 

hes not even mine 

he will never be

i wont allow myself 

he doesnt like me

but i like him so much

i care for him so much

but its like hes forcing himself to like me

pretends that cares 

he might care 

and he might like

he might pretend 

i dont want much i just want to be there for him

i want him to know that he can tell me 

but trust is hard to earn 

i worry that if i talk 

he might feel the force to talk 

even though i dont want him to

please i beg you dont force yourself to like someone 

i dont want that 

its enough for me to at least be your friend

i care too much to get mad at you

i never get mad 

and i try to never get jealous

i try to impress you 

i try being mature but thats not who i am

im a girl that loves unicorns

and believes theres a pink bunny that grants wishes

so many things youll be surprised to know about me

i remember how i talked to you the first time 

and how i talk to you now 

its like ive known you for years 

you take too much space in my heart 

i try to shrink you but i cant 

should i leave my country 

go to the mountains and think for a while 

i really wish i could do that 

but i cant

 

I want to read

oh how much i love the smell of books

they smell old yet so new

they mean more to me than some people 

i loved characters in books more than i loved some people in real life

oh how much i love books 

those pages you see before the beginning of the story

half empty yet seem to interest me so much

so many authors i consider my heroes

they save me by writing beautiful stories

stories that enhance my imagination

it makes me want to live a story

a story that will be written on paper

something about books that i adore 

i dont know what is it 

it makes me want to dance 

books make me happy

books are one of the pleasures in my life

theyre beautiful

more than other people 

sometimes you can guess what the writer was thinking 

the happiest things in my life 

are my books

i wish i can sit on a cloud and read 

read my heart out 

read until my lips cant move 

read until my mind cant handle any word

thats all i want to do 

i want to read 

all day 

She

i dont know

they told her she repeat those words too much

she tries to make you miss her but you dont

will you ever miss her when she dies

will you even cry

a weirdo thats what they said

she admitted to that

deosnt get much in life

yet wants so much in life

suffered since a young age

rarely experienced love

how many times has she been used

how many times has she became blind

by a love that never deserved eyes

her feelings cannot be putted into words

words cannot express the way she feels

so empty all the time

she tries to fit in

but she realized its a blessing to be different

the word weird isnt so bad after all

she enjoys it

she enjoys being weird

actually she loves it

he doestnt give a fuck

or at least that was her wish

Dont break me i beg

i wonder all night 

will i ever change 

and if i do will it be for the better or worse

depression trying to control me 

but i cant let it control me 

i pray, i pray everyday 

praying to God to save me 

and i know he will

i just have to wait 

“be patient” i tell myself everyday 

not knowing if this is being patient 

changing for someone i never saw 

or at least wanting to

is it him i want to change for or is it me

im not going to let his existence control me

when he ignores me

i wonder if i did something wrong

and when he talks to me

i wonder if he likes me

a pile of emotions

stuck inside 

trying to scream but nothing comes out 

why do i feel so empty 

so many question 

i dont know who’s going to answer 

i tell my self he’s different

and i start to think

and remember thats what all girls say when theyre in love

 before theyre hearts get broken 

they repeat “hes different”

when deep inside theres a big possibility hes the same

dont break me i beg

i know youre not mine 

but dont break me 

or i will fall

deep inside a hole 

and i will never come out